LETTER XXX.
Miss Montague, To John Belford, Esq;
M. Hall, Friday, Sept. 15.
Sir, My Lord having the gout in his right-hand, his Lordship, and Lady Sarah, and Lady Betty, have commanded me to inform you, that before your Letter came, Mr. Lovelace was preparing for a foreign Tour. We shall endeavour to hasten him away on the motives you suggest.
We are all extremely affected with the dear Lady's death. Lady Betty and Lady Sarah have been indisposed ever since they heard of it. They had pleased themselves, as had my Sister and self, with the hopes of cultivating her acquaintance and friendship after he was gone abroad, upon her own terms. Her kind remembrance
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of each of us has renewed, tho' it could not heighten, our regrets for so irreparable a loss. We shall order Mr. Finch, our goldsmith, to wait on you. He has our directions about the rings. They will be long, long worn in memory of the dear Testatrix.
Every-body is assured, that you will do all in your power to prevent farther ill consequences from this melancholy affair. My Lord desires his compliments to you. I am, Sir,
Your humble Servant, Ch. Montague.
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This collection having run into a much greater length than was wished, it is thought proper to omit several Letters that passed between Colonel Morden, Miss Howe, Mr. Belford, and Mr. Hickman, in relation to the execution of the Lady's Will, &c.
It is however necessary to observe on this subject, That the unhappy Mother, being supported by the two Uncles, influenced the afflicted Father to over-rule all his Son's objections, and to direct a literal observation of the Will; and at the same time to give up all the sums which he was impowered by it to reimburse himself; as also to take upon himself to defray the funeral expences.
Mr. Belford so much obliged Miss Howe by his steadiness, equity, and dispatch, and by his readiness to contribute to the directed collection, that she voluntarily entered into a correspondence with him, as the representative of her beloved friend. In the course of which, he communicated to her (in confidence) the Letters which passed between him and Mr. Lovelace, and, by Colonel Morden's consent, those which passed between that gentleman and himself.
He sent with the first parcel of Letters which he had transcribed out of short-hand for Miss Howe, a Letter to Mr. Hickman, dated the 16th of September, in which he expresses himself as follows:
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'But I ought, Sir, in this parcel to have kept out one Letter. It is that which relates to the Interview between yourself and Mr. Lovelace, at Mr. Dormer's (a) [Footnote a: 1Kb]. In which Mr. Lovelace treats you with an air of levity, which neither your person, your character, nor your commission, deserved; but which was his usual way of treating every one whose business he was not pleased with. I hope, Sir, you have too much greatness of mind, to be disturbed at the contents of this Letter, should Miss Howe communicate them to you; and the rather, as it is impossible that you should suffer with her on that account.'
Mr. Belford then excuses Mr. Lovelace, as a good-natured man with all his faults; and gives instances of his still greater freedoms with himself.
To this Mr. Hickman answers, in his Letter of the 18th:
'As to Mr. Lovelace's treatment of me in the Letter you are pleased to mention, I shall not be concerned at it, whatever it be. I went to him prepared to expect odd behaviour from him; and was not disappointed. I argue to myself, in all such cases as this, as Miss Howe, from her ever-dear friend, argues; That if the reflections thrown upon me are just, I ought not only to forgive them, but to endeavour to profit by them: If unjust, that I ought to despise them, and the reflector too; since it would be inexcuseable to strengthen by anger an enemy whose malice might be disarmed by contempt. And, moreover, I should be almost sorry to find myself spoken well of by a man who could treat as he treated a Lady who was an ornament to her Sex, and to human nature.
'I thank you, however, Sir, for your consideration for me in this particular; and for your whole Letter, which gives me so desirable an instance of the friendship which you assured me of, when I was last in
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town; and which I as cordially embrace, as wish to cultivate.'
Miss Howe, in hers of the 20th, acknowleging the receipt of the Letters, and Papers, and Legacies, sent with Mr. Belford's Letter to Mr. Hickman, assures him, 'That no use shall be made of his communications, but what he shall approve of.
He had mentioned with compassion the distresses of the Harlowe family---'Persons of a pitiful nature, says she, may pity them. I am not one of those. You, I think, pity the infernal man likewise; while I from my heart grudge him his phrensy, because it deprives him of that remorse, which, I hope, on his recovery, will never leave him. At times, Sir, let me tell you, that I hate your whole Sex for his sake; even men of unblameable characters; whom at those times I cannot but look upon as persons I have not yet found out.
'If my dear creature's personal jewels be sent up to you for sale, I desire that I may be the purchaser of them, at the highest price---Of the necklace and solitaire particularly.
'O what tears did the perusal of my Beloved's Will cost me! ---But I must not touch upon the heart-piercing subject. I can neither take it up, nor quit it, but with execration of the man whom all the world must execrate.'
Mr. Belford, in his answer, promises, that she shall be the purchaser of the jewels, if they come into his hands.
He acquaints her, that the family had given Col. Morden the keys of all that belonged to the dear departed: That the unhappy Mother had (as the Will allows) ordered a piece of needlework to be set aside for her, and had desired Mrs. Norton to get the little book of Meditations transcribed, and to let her have the original, as it was all of her dear daughter's hand-writing; and as it might, when she could bear to look into it,
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administer consolation to herself. And that she had likewise reserved for herself her picture in the Vandyke taste.
Mr. Belford sends with this Letter to Miss Howe the Lady's memorandum-book; and promises to send her copies of the several posthumous Letters. He tells her, that Mr. Lovelace being upon the recovery, he had inclosed the posthumous Letter directed for him to Lord M. that his Lordship might give it to him, or not, as he should find he could bear it. The following is a copy of that Letter.
To Mr. Lovelace.
Thursday, Aug. 24.
I told you, in the Letter I wrote to you on Tuesday last (a) [Footnote a: 1Kb], that you should have another sent you when I had got to my Father's house.
I presume to say, that I am now, at your receiving of This, arrived there; and I invite you to follow me, as soon as you can be prepared for so great a journey.
Not to allegorize further---My fate is now, at your perusal of this, accomplished. My doom is unalterably fixed: And I am either a miserable or a happy Being to all Eternity. If happy, I owe it solely to the Divine mercy: If miserable, to your undeserved cruelty. ---And consider now, for your own sake, gay, cruel, fluttering, unhappy man! consider, whether the barbarous and perfidious treatment I have met with from you, was worthy of the hazard of your immortal soul; since your wicked views were not to be effected but by the
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wilful breach of the most solemn vows that ever were made by man; and those aided by a violence and baseness unworthy of a human creature.
In time then, once more, I wish you to consider your ways. Your golden dream cannot long last. Your present course can yield you pleasure no longer than you can keep off thought or reflection. A hardened insensibility is the only foundation on which your inward tranquillity is built. When once a dangerous sickness seizes you; when once effectual remorse breaks in upon you; how dreadful will be your condition! How poor a triumph will you then find it, to have been able, by a series of black perjuries, and studied baseness, under the name of Gallantry or Intrigue, to betray poor unexperienced young creatures, who perhaps knew nothing but their duty till they knew you! ---Not one good action in the hour of languishing to recollect, not one worthy intention to revolve, it will be all reproach and horror; and you will wish to have it in your power to compound for annihilation.
Reflect, Sir, that I can have no other motive in what I write, than your good, and the safety of other innocent creatures, who may be drawn in by your wicked arts and perjuries. You have not, in my wishes for your future welfare, the wishes of a suppliant wife, endeavouring for her own sake, as well as for yours, to induce you to reform those ways. They are wholly as disinterested, as undeserved. But I should mistrust my own penitence, were I capable of wishing to recompense evil for evil---if, black as your offences have been against me, I could not forgive, as I wish to be forgiven.
I repeat, therefore, that I do forgive you. And may the Almighty forgive you too! Nor have I, at the writing of this, any other essential regrets than what are occasioned by the grief I have given to parents, who, till I knew you, were the most indulgent of parents; by the scandal given to the other branches of my family;
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by the disreputation brought upon my Sex; and by the offence given to Virtue in my fall.
As to myself, you have only robbed me of what once were my favourite expectations in the transient life I shall have quitted when you receive This. You have only been the cause that I have been cut off in the bloom of youth, and of curtailing a life, that might have been agreeable to myself, or otherwise, as had suited the designs and ends of Providence. I have reason to be thankful, for being taken away from the evil of supporting my part of a yoke with a man so unhappy, I will only say, that, in all probability, every hour I had lived with him might have brought with it some new trouble. And I am (indeed thro' sharp afflictions and distresses) indebted to you, secondarily, as I humbly presume to hope, for so many years of glory, as might have proved years of danger, temptation, and anguish, had they been added to my mortal life.
So, Sir, tho' no thanks to your intention, you have done me real service; and in return, I wish you happy. But such has been your life hitherto, that you can have no time to lose, in setting about your repentance. Repentance to such as have lived only carelesly, and in the omission of their regular duties, and who never aimed to draw any poor creatures into evil, is not so easy a task, nor so much in our own power, as some imagine. How difficult a grace then to be obtained, where the guilt is premeditated, wilful, and complicated!
To say I once respected you with a preference, is what I ought to blush to own, since at the very time, I was far from thinking you even a moral man; tho' I little thought that you, or indeed that any man breathing, could be---what you have proved yourself to be. But, indeed, Sir, I have long been greatly above you: For from my heart I have despised you, and all your ways, ever since I saw what manner of man you were.
Nor is it to be wondered, that I should be able so to do, when that preference was not grounded on ignoble
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motives. For I was weak enough, and presumptuous enough, to hope to be a means in the hand of Providence to reclaim a man, whom I thought worthy of the attempt.
Nor have I yet, as you will see by the pains I take, on this solemn occasion, to awaken you out of your sensual dream, given over all hopes of this nature.
Hear me therefore, O Lovelace! as one speaking from the dead---Lose no time---Set about your repentance instantly---Be no longer the instrument of Satan, to draw poor souls into those subtile snares, which at last shall entangle your own feet. Seek not to multiply your offences, till they become beyond the power, as I may say, of the Divine Mercy to forgive; since justice, no less than mercy, is an attribute of the Almighty.
Tremble and reform, when you read what is the portion of the wicked man from God. Thus it is written:
'The triumphing of the wicked is short, and the joy of the hypocrite but for a moment. He is cast into a net by his own feet---He walketh upon a snare. Terrors shall make him afraid on every side, and shall drive him to his feet. His strength shall be hunger-bitten, and destruction shall be ready at his side. The first-born of death shall devour his strength. His remembrance shall perish from the earth; and he shall have no name in the streets. He shall be chased out of the world. He shall neither have Son nor Nephew among his people. They that have seen him shall say, Where is he? He shall fly away as a dream: He shall be chased away as a vision of the night. His meat is the gall of asps within him. He shall flee from the iron weapon, and the bow of steel shall strike him thro'. A fire not blown shall consume him. The heaven shall reveal his iniquity, and the earth shall rise up against him. The worm shall feed sweetly on him. He shall be no more remembred. --- This is the fate of him that knoweth not God.'---
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Whenever you shall be inclined to consult the Sacred Oracles, from whence the above threatenings are extracted, you will find doctrines and texts which a truly penitent and contrite heart may lay hold of for its consolation.
May yours, Mr. Lovelace, become such! And may you be enabled to escape the fate denounced against the abandoned man, and be entitled to the mercies of a long-suffering and gracious God, is the sincere prayer of
Clarissa Harlowe.